Counselling One Another
Through the CCEF course on counselling, Joshua learnt that humility and neediness for the gospel, attributes of a follower of Jesus, are what qualify us to counsel one another.
How can you walk with one another during challenging times? What do you do when your friends, family members, and coworkers tell you they are struggling?
Usually, we recommend or seek professional help for really serious problems. But one thing I have been learning from the CCEF course is that the Bible tells us that believers are competent to counsel each other. If you are a follower of Jesus and have the Holy Spirit, you are qualified to counsel others in the church.
This is because followers of Jesus should be humble and needy. We need Jesus Christ and the gospel. Needy people are the best people to help out other needy people because they tend to be more dependent on the gospel and God’s grace.
During this CCEF course, I learned many useful skills but one of the principles that I found particularly instructive was the importance of having a humble heart. Having a humble heart that considers others before myself is something that does not come naturally to me. I find that I can be a very proud person who often thinks that my way is the best way. I have found that through my conversations with people, if I act very proudly I will push people away instead of growing and building my relationship with them. With my wife in particular, most of our conflicts have been due to my pride. I have often told her that she simply needs to listen to me and do things my way and all her problems will be solved. This prideful heart is something that I want to get rid of because it can be so damaging to others and to myself. More importantly it ruins my relationship with God, who is angry with the sin of pride.
Philippians 2:1–9 and Ephesians 4:2–3 have been particularly helpful to me in working through my pride. Meditating on Philippians 2:1–9 has helped me see how humble Christ was and how His humility fuelled His ministry to us. Jesus Christ was with His Father in heaven, He knows everything. He was the one person who deserved to bask in glory because He had all the credentials to be proud, yet He humbled himself to the point of death on a cross. He took on the role of a servant to save wretched sinners like you and me. Jesus did what is best for us instead of what was best for Himself.
Therefore, as followers of Christ let us seek to live in a similar humble manner as outlined in Ephesians 4:2–3. Let’s live in humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. A humble attitude is what we need to fuel counselling conversations with one another. As we go about our conversations with one another, giving advice, speaking about sin, counselling through scripture, we are to be humble, gentle, patient and forbearing. If not, we may be causing more harm than doing good. I hope and pray that the Spirit will continue to help us be aware of times we are proud and help us stay humble and needy of Christ in the gospel. Then God starts to use us as His instruments of help to others.
Your neediness for the gospel qualifies you to help others. As Christians, we need to be humble and acknowledge our need for Jesus when helping others. We all need to look to God and point others to God and the gospel in our struggles.
If you are weak and ordinary, if you feel like a mess but you have the Spirit because you are trusting in Jesus, you have the right credentials. You are one of the ordinary people God uses to help others. This week, look out for other needy people like yourself and encourage one another to trust in God and depend on Him. Look for ways to be humble and dependent on God as you seek to love and care for others in need.